I saw “The Avengers” last night, which was okay. First half was rather slow and tedious, but the battle scene in the last third of the movie was not so bad. But anything nowadays that includes the Hulk reminds me of the greatest movie review ever written. I never saw the Hulk movies, but I can’t imagine them being nearly half as entertaining as this review that appeared in The Guardian:
Hulk. Smash!” Yes. Hulk. Smash. Yes. Smash. Big Hulk smash. Smash cars. Buildings. Army tanks. Hulk not just smash. Hulk also go rarrr! Then smash again. Smash important, obviously. Smash Hulk’s USP. What Hulk smash most? Hulk smash all hope of interesting time in cinema. Hulk take all effort of cinema, effort getting babysitter, effort finding parking, and Hulk put great green fist right through it. Hulk crush all hopes of entertainment. Hulk in boring film.
…
Tim Roth come on. As evil soldier. Fighting Hulk personal for him. Roth typical evil Brit. Roth supposedly working for US army. Yet Roth Brit. Critic annoyed by stereotyping. Roth get injected with serum. Become Hulky supervillain. Smash cars. Tanks. Only with no trousers. Roth groin area ambiguous. Groin area look lumpy. Bumpy. Perhaps odd penis. Perhaps odd trousers. Critic … not sure.
I can’t think of a review more to the point than this one.
The Incredible Hulk | Film | The Guardian.